Basketball Life Improvements.

Man, I wish I could've seen it.

Two techs, a mini-fight, raining threes, buzzer beaters.

Of course I'm talking about the Pacers/Heat game. 

I just watched the highlights. 

I might've swooned over Paul George a little. Ok, a lot. I mean how could you not trip with a dunk like this?!?

It was intense. That reminds me of a talk I heard on KFAN radio the other day. 

About post play celebration. 

In the highlight clip, you can see Lebron sink a sick three and then put up the "A-Ok" sign by his eye. It's a symbol for THREE! It's a celebration. But like the DJ said the other day, why do they get praise for doing what they're supposed to be doing. According to ESPN he gets paid 19 Mill each year to play. So yeah, you better be sinking those threes. 

I get the idea that you're hyped up, a lot was riding on the line, you're visiting a team that could (And did) clinch the Central Division title. You're excited, but is that kind of celebration needed? I've played sports, scoring is a big deal. I get it. But, you're here for entertainment, not to pick fights on the court. If I wanted fights, I'll buy hockey tickets. (Which reminds me, why do I live in Minnesota if I don't even like hockey?!)

Take a look at the video and you be the judge, did last nights game go too far? Pacers/Heat Rewind

But that's not really why I'm mad. I just like to compare everything to basketball. 

I wrote a blog post about why I thought social media was ruining my life. Well today I came across another great article that helps articulate my uproar a little bit more. Read it here.

As people, do we need to celebrate each and every little victory in our lives. The second we do something, why does it have to go straight up to Facebook? Or Twitter? Or Instagram? 

Don't get me wrong, I'm just as bad as the next person. But why do we want to rub it in other peoples' faces that we're doing what we're supposed to be doing? 

So what if you happen to be Jimmy Fallon's producer? What does it matter if you swam with dolphins or hiked the Grand Canyon? Just because I want those things doesn't mean I'll never get there. You're at that point in your life, I am not. And quite frankly, I sleep the same no matter what you do. 

If it strokes your ego to post all about it, fine. Do it. But as the author of the Huff Post article says, "My suggestion? Make a call. Send an email to people you love. Heck, have a party. Let your actual friends know in person. Kind of a novel concept, no? And say you want those business associates you are Facebook friends with to know about your good news, your hard work? There's nothing like a update on your professional website to tell them all about it. You might also post a link to it. That keeps it professional and WAY less douchey."

Don't think people actually give you more praise because you're a 24-year-old business owner. Cause as much as they see you and your accomplishments now, they're going to be right there when you fail. It's part of life, the ups and downs. Just like the true fans won't get mad when you lose the big game. 

So this is my public confession that I will stop judging my opinions and self-worth on the one kid I did that one thing with that one time. Try it with me. See what happens. 

Head Over Feet

I was talking to a friend today and got reminded of how wonderful Alanis Morissette is.
The joke was that I'm always attracted to angsty people.
But in truth, I'm attracted to people who just happen to be as emotional and raw as me.

So I opened up iTunes and went straight to the most famous "Head Over Feet". I looked at the lyrics and decided, yup, this is exactly the guy that I'm going to need.

While I hit repeat, go ahead and enjoy it. Sing along. Feel the passion of knowing someone can love you, unconditionally.

I had no choice but to hear you

You stated your case time and again

I thought about it

You treat me like I'm a princess

I'm not used to liking that

You ask how my day was

You've already won me over in spite of me

And don't be alarmed if I fall head over feet

Don't be surprised if I love you for all that you are

I couldn't help it

It's all your fault

Your love is thick and it swallowed me whole

You're so much braver than I gave you credit for

That's not lip service

You've already won me over in spite of me

And don't be alarmed if I fall head over feet

Don't be surprised if I love you for all that you are

I couldn't help it

It's all your fault

You are the bearer of unconditional things

You held your breath and the door for me

Thanks for your patience

You're the best listener that I've ever met

You're my best friend

Best friend with benefits

What took me so long

I've never felt this healthy before

I've never wanted something rational

I am aware now

I am aware now

You've already won me over in spite of me

And don't be alarmed if I fall head over feet

Don't be surprised if I love you for all that you are

I couldn't help it

It's all your fault

And remember, no matter where you end up and who you end up with, make sure they love you, in spite of yourself.

A New Kind Of Prayer

Do you ever get tired of hearing "Give your plans up to God. He knows what's best for you"?!
Cause I do.

I have this problem. I'm a planner.
When it comes to making a plan, I dive in.
I think long and short term, if this or if that.
I make great plans. (I also want to give a s/o to all the friends and family that give me advice on how to make a better plan. But that's neither here nor there.)

Recently, I've been thinking about giving all my planning to God. What would I do? What would fill my time? What would give me hope that things would work out?

Now don't get me wrong, I trust that God has my best interest in mind. I trust that He made me perfect and has my path all planned out. I trust that He will provide. But I also truly believe that He made me a planner. That it was His thought and His hands that created me to look at life a little differently.

So, my prayer has changed.
Instead of saying "God I'm giving this up to you…" and then backing out and taking control again, I've started praying "God, this is my plan, please stop it, if it's not what you want of me."
It's kind of liberating. I've been less stressed. My anxiety is going down.












Try it for a week. See how you feel.

<3XOT

Life is like Basketball

Will Smith told me something yesterday. Ok, he didn't speak directly to me. And he didn't even say it yesterday. But the message was clear: Life is like Basketball.

As a Hoosier, I'd like to say "DUH!!!" but let me tell you why I think Will Smith hit the nail on the head during this interview with Jimmy Fallon.

Mr. Smith said he went skydiving because he's 45. He said it's because he is in the third quarter of his life. When a basketball team comes out after halftime, they don't just sit back and let the game happen, they're powered up and they're ready to fight. I think that's an awesome analogy as to where I am in my life right now.

If we break down the game:

The first quarter is when you establish yourself and your team on the court. You fight hard and fair to get your points and make your presence known. I think that can be wrapped up in all the time we spend with the educational system. We're fighting to learn and achieve and just make ourselves present. We show up, we gain points/knowledge. We don't have much after the first quarter, but there's enough to prove we're vibrant, living, productive members of society.

The second quarter (where I am now…) is when you have to hold your own. The other team (your peers) has established themselves too. It's now a full on battle. You have to fight to prove that all those points you earned in the first quarter are going to get you ahead. You've got to continue to work hard. You've got to keep earning points/knowledge. You've gotta keep playing fair, but if you need to take a :30 timeout, that's ok. If you need to grab a squirt of water, that's ok. Rehydrate, regroup and get going again. The game's not over. You can't stop.

Halftime: I would venture to say this is where my parents are. Where many of my friends' parents are. Their kids have all ran into the locker room and they're sitting on the bleachers listening to the athletic director ask trivia questions for prizes. They're just waiting for the next half. It's an in-between. It's not fun. You don't know what the second half is going to bring. But, they're willing to stick it out.

The third quarter (where Will Smith is…) is when you come out swinging. You're pumped. Halftime has allowed you to reflect on the first half of your life. All those points that have added up. It's allowed you to make a plan on where to go next. It's allowed you to grab the ball and start playing the game for you. This is the time you get back up out on the court and dominate. You put up more points and you pull ahead.

The fourth quarter is something I'm not familiar with at all. My grandparents fall under this category, so this is my analogy: You see the end. You know it's coming. But you don't give up. You don't let the  other team come back and beat you. You keep fighting until the end. You get more points (and if you're Reggie Miller you get them all right at the last second) and you finish the game strong. You make sure when the game is over, you've left it all out on the court.

And that is why I think life is like basketball.
And we can go ahead and add the cheesy Wayne Gretzky quote:

<3XOT

The Lessons I've learned.

Sometimes life can suck. Learn, grow, move on...

1. You can't trust everyone. You've heard the phrase, a secret between three people is only a secret if two are dead? Well that's so true. Because no matter how much you trust that person at this point in your life, it may not always be that way. And that person will know your secret. And secrets can get you into trouble. So unless you want everyone to know, keep it to yourself. And if it's really that bad, you probably shouldn't do it in the first place. Because people will find out. And you can't trust everyone.

2. Just because you love someone doesn't mean they have to love you back. And vice versa. This is very important. There are people that I would give my kidney for. People that are dear to me. People that interest me and fascinate me. These people probably mean more to me than I do to them. Which is quite a bummer. Cause I think we'd be great together. Apparently not. But on the other hand, I've probably got people out there that are thinking that about me and I barely smile at them when I walk past. It's a hard fact of life, but when two people are supposed to be in each others' lives, their paths will cross at the right moment.

3. Something that looks too good to be true, probably is. You can win a million dollars, you can get free cake for a year, all your student loan debt can go away!!! Why wouldn't you take that deal? Oh yeah, because then they get your soul. On a smaller note even, if you're looking at something right now that you think would totally improve your life, ask if it would make you happy six months from now. If the answer is yes, do it. But chances are, it's just the next best thing.

4. Something that looks wrong, probably is. Do you ever get that gut feeling? An eery silence in your mind? That you just know something is off? I've gotten that before. Now, it's your chance to go forth and make that silence disappear. You have control to make the wrong, right.

5. Taking someone's opinion as the be all end all answer to YOUR life isn't good. Getting advice from your peers is a good thing. They know you and they can guess what is a right and wrong decision. But, if you're going to ask someone their opinion and then take it without consulting yourself first, you're in for some heartache. Ultimately, you know what's best for you. Asking opinions to get an educated opinion may be great, but your desires outweigh theirs. Listen to your heart.

6. Food can, in fact, be comforting in times of hardship. Blah blah blah diet. Yeah, well guess what diet, I'm gonna be a real grump and less productive and more hostile and definitely physically threatening if I don't get that McDonald's in my stomach. So just shut up and let me eat my feelings. In a week or so, the pain will subside and I'll be back to cabbage soup and salads for lunch.

7. Saying "I wish" doesn't get results. You must write down your goals, make steps to reach them, and then act upon those steps. Unless Robert Williams shows up at your doorstep today, I don't think any wishes are going to be granted without hard work.

I'm going to channel by inner Bob Frost and just remember that life in fact does go on...

Hurt

I've been hurt. 

I've hurt a lot.

I just want the world to be a happier place. 

Not the whole world. Just my world. 

I'm not my past.

And I don't know what the future holds. 

That hurt from my past has made my life really rough. I don't regret any of it, though. Some things I shouldn't have done. Some things were big mistakes. Some things in my past were completely out of my control. But I wouldn't be the person I am now if they hadn't had happened. I hope that one day the hurt from the past stops hurting my future. That what crap that's stuck in my heart will finally escape. That the ones that have been victim of my hurt will forgive me like I've forgiven myself. I have the power to overcome and the power to move on. And that's what I need.

There are very important things in my life, but sometimes as important as things seem, they can be very toxic. Whether it's people, places, or materialistic objects, I need to purge it. The bad. The angry. The bitter. The hurt. Things that make me ache and scream and physically fall ill aren't good. I wouldn't keep eating food that made me sick, so why should I keep putting emotions in my body that make me sick? 

I'm done. I'm done with the hurt. I'm done staying up late at night crying. I'm done feeling like a worthless piece of shit. I'm done being called names because I speak my mind. I'm done self-doubting. I'm done acting like I'm someone I'm not. 

I don't doubt there won't be hurt in my future. 

But I'm drowning in it right now. 

I just have to be done. 

There's a "right" world out there waiting for me.

It's not my past.

It's not filled with hurt.